Ten Tips for the Jazz Musician

A few things to remember at the gig (or at the recording session)

1.  Everyone should play the same tune.
2. Always wear dark glasses, the darker the better.  You won’t be able to see a thing but people will think you’re deep and mysterious.
3. When talking into the mic, always start with “Hey man…..”
4. Carefully tune your instrument before playing.  That way you can play out of tune all night long with a clear conscience.
5. If you play a wrong note, give a nasty look to one of the other players.
6. If you can hear the guy playing next to you, you’re not loud enough.
7. If you are completely lost, stop everyone and say, “I think we should tune.”
8. Markings for dynamics, slurs and other expression marks should be ignored.  They are only there to embellish the printed score.
9. A wrong note played timidly is a wrong note.  A wrong note played with confidence is an interpretation.
10. When everyone else has finished playing, you should not play any notes you have left.